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my grandmother's tartan bag sits on an upside-down bucket in the basement,
full to the brim with little liquor bottles and cardboard boxes

I go to do the laundry,
pass it twice an hour

and every time, just for a moment, I think she's visiting
all saints
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Daily Deviation

Given 2013-11-03
not grief, but something like it is by ~consolecadet "is grounded in a profoundly personal loss, yet speaks to a universal emotion" (suggester's words). ( Suggested by beeinthebottle and Featured by neurotype )
:iconbraxton-t-rutledge:
Braxton-T-Rutledge Featured By Owner Nov 25, 2013
This is extremely solid.

Try reading it with a period after 'hour'

last line "every time I think she's visiting"

I'd almost suggest breaking that to read

"every time I think
she's visiting".

You say a lot without many wasted words, provide enough details to be easily relate-able. 
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:iconfuzzyhoser:
FuzzyHoser Featured By Owner Nov 5, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
The brevity is what makes this feel so pure. It's just enough without being over-said. Well done. :heart:
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:iconconsolecadet:
consolecadet Featured By Owner Nov 6, 2013
Thank you.
Reply
:iconfuzzyhoser:
FuzzyHoser Featured By Owner Nov 6, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
:heart:
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:iconkaitforest:
KaitForest Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013   Writer
i really love this. damn me for not checking my messages, this is gold.
well deserved. :heart:
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:iconconsolecadet:
consolecadet Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2013
Thank you! I'm glad you like it. <3
Reply
:icontessriane:
Tessriane Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
<3 <3 <3 <3 <3
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:iconconsolecadet:
consolecadet Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013
?
Reply
:icontessriane:
Tessriane Featured By Owner Nov 6, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I couldn't think of anything else to say. I favorited this, and I love it. I just couldn't think of anything to say.
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:iconthegalleryofeve:
TheGalleryOfEve Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Congratulations on your well-deserved DD!!! :iconflyingheartsplz::iconlainloveplz::iconflyingheartsplz: :clap::clap::clap:
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:iconconsolecadet:
consolecadet Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013
Thanks.
Reply
:iconobserver14:
Observer14 Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013  Professional Traditional Artist
Wow.  amazing clarity.  Take a simple image, experience, truth, and put so few words around it... just enough for us to see the thing you saw, and understand your pain.  Even the title is wonderful.

I think it was C.S. Lewis who said, "Reason is the natural order of truth; but imagination is the organ of meaning."  You have brought meaning.

Thank you.
Reply
:iconconsolecadet:
consolecadet Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013
Thank /you/.

I worry a lot about clarity, so it's nice to hear I'm doing an okay job on that front.
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:iconobserver14:
Observer14 Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2013  Professional Traditional Artist
Well, I haven't had a chance yet to read any of your other work, but you definitely nailed it here.

It was really random that I stumbled across your poem here.  My parents are in their 90's, and failing fast, so you just happened to poke at a rather raw place in my experience too.  Sometimes, having someone else so eloquently portray the very emotion you are experiencing helps you understand, and in a way, cope with going through that journey.

Thank you for that gift.


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:iconconsolecadet:
consolecadet Featured By Owner Nov 6, 2013
Wow, thank you. I'm really glad I could help, even if just a little. I'm so sorry to hear about your parents.
Reply
:iconobserver14:
Observer14 Featured By Owner Nov 6, 2013  Professional Traditional Artist
Thank you so much!  :-)

(I'll be back to poke around and read your other work, when I've got a couple of minutes to really spend absorbing them.)

Blessings!

Reply
:iconalapip:
alapip Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
a DD!  congratulations, Rachael! :hug:
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:iconconsolecadet:
consolecadet Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013
Thanks!
Reply
:iconginga-ninga1994:
Ginga-Ninga1994 Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
this is so beautiful and sad. You deserved that DD!
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:iconconsolecadet:
consolecadet Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013
Thanks.
Reply
:iconginga-ninga1994:
Ginga-Ninga1994 Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
:D
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:iconrosescarlet:
RoseScarlet Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013  Student Writer
Oh god this is just~
Reply
:iconconsolecadet:
consolecadet Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013
Glad you think it's just. I'm not sure what kind of just that is, but thanks?
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:iconrosescarlet:
RoseScarlet Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013  Student Writer
No lol I was going to say, like, just beautiful, or just amazing, but then I didn't think that would sound good enough so I used a  ~ :D
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:iconconsolecadet:
consolecadet Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013
Tilde works for me. :>
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:iconrosescarlet:
RoseScarlet Featured By Owner Nov 16, 2013  Student Writer
hehehe
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:iconthesistineapple:
TheSistineApple Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013
congrats on the DD!
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:iconconsolecadet:
consolecadet Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013
Thank you.
Reply
:iconthesistineapple:
TheSistineApple Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013
you're welcome :D 
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:iconer49563:
er49563 Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013  Student General Artist
this is actually quite good for being so short :D
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:iconconsolecadet:
consolecadet Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013
Thank you.
Reply
:iconthetaoofchaos:
thetaoofchaos Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013   Writer
Congrats on the feature.  This really fulfills the promise of short form verse:  a lifetime in a few lines.  Well done.
Reply
:iconconsolecadet:
consolecadet Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013
Thank you! I'm glad you like it.
Reply
:iconshire7:
Shire7 Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Congrats to the DD :heart: <3
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:iconconsolecadet:
consolecadet Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013
Thanks.
Reply
:iconshire7:
Shire7 Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
No problem =)
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:iconssensory:
ssensory Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013   Writer
Major congrats on the well-deserved DD. :heart:
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:iconconsolecadet:
consolecadet Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013
Thank you!
Reply
:iconbeeinthebottle:
beeinthebottle Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013   Writer
Congratulations on the DD -- very well deserved.
Reply
:iconconsolecadet:
consolecadet Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013
Thank you! And thanks for recommending. :>
Reply
:iconbeeinthebottle:
beeinthebottle Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013   Writer
:heart:
Reply
:iconriparii:
riparii Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013
small and faceted as a gem
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:iconconsolecadet:
consolecadet Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013
Thank you! Your comment's more poetic than my poem :>
Reply
:iconneurotype:
neurotype Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I love how concise this is. *beeinthebottle is spot on, it's how you convey the image that matters....
Reply
:iconmisslunarose:
MissLunaRose Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013   General Artist
Wow! This is a masterpiece. :clap: I admire your ability to convey something so emotional in only a few words.

I love how you don't use periods at the end of your sentences. It really emphasizes the unending nature of your story.

Congratulations on a much deserved DD! :huggle:
Reply
:iconconsolecadet:
consolecadet Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013
Thanks!

You're reading a lot more meaning into this than is there. I didn't use periods 'cause I'm lazy and I like the way it looks. 's far from a masterpiece.
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:iconmisslunarose:
MissLunaRose Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013   General Artist
You're welcome. :hug:

Well, whether you were motivated by laziness or artistic expression, it's still a masterpiece. ;P
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:iconaquagalaxy:
AquaGalaxy Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013
congrats on the dd! >w<
Reply
:iconconsolecadet:
consolecadet Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013
Thank you.
Reply
:iconnatanarihelliat:
NatanarihelLiat Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
My great-aunt died today in the morning, and now I see this. I am almost crying now.
Reply
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